independence

Hi Sidra,

You've had some significant events happen in the last month or so. You had your school winter program, your neighbor Jo Jo had a birthday party and you are on a family vacation in Sunriver with your east coast relatives. In the meantime you are starting to show some real independence.

In your school program you were a key part of several songs or poems. If you remember, last year in your first program you got overwhelmed by the size of the audience and left the stage to sit with your mom and tante Debbie after about a minute of the show. This time you lasted the whole show although you didn't sing much. We knew you knew all the words but you seemed to be watching the others do most of the singing. I'm only commenting about what I saw on the short video clip i've seen. I didn't get to go to the program as it was in the morning on a day I had to work. I am still waiting to see the full video we purchased. You were very cute when you spoke to me on the phone later that day, asking if I was 'bummed' that I wasn't able to be there. Of course I said yes. One of the songs you sang was called 'Channuka is here.' Your school meets in a church and is pretty Christian based but they asked your mom to talk to your class about Channuka and they included some songs in the program.

You are starting to do some more things on your own. You're getting better at doing bathroom stuff on your own. I wouldn't say you're exactly flying solo there but you're getting better. You are very interested in your clothing choices and can almost completely dress yourself. You haven't really made any attempts to do your own hair yet, but that's pretty complicated. At least I think it is. And I would really like you to do more of your own tooth brushing. That's something we should work on.

Another thing you've taken upon yourself is answering the phone. It works pretty well when one of your parents is nearby but you did handle one call on your own pretty well. I was upstairs lying down with your sister helping her get to sleep for her nap. I heard the phone ring but made no attempt to get it. You were working on your Playmobil wedding set downstairs right by the phone. So you picked it up and had a short conversation. You said that Carol wasn't there and a couple of other things and hung up. When I came down about 10 minutes later I asked you about it. You said that Dennis had called. I was skeptical. Your mom knows 2 people named Dennis but it seemed unlikely that either would be calling then. I checked the phone and found that American Tire had called. So after a couple more questions you said that Dennis said 'the wheels are ready.' So you got the message complete. Another time you answered before I could reach it and it was your doctor's office. You gave me the phone when they asked you for a parent. Anyway, we probably need to get you to be a little less exuberant about answering so that you don't end up talking to someone you shouldn't.

You had a good time at your neighbor Jo Jo's birthday party. It was at a pizza parlor that had a fun play area. You went down the slide many times, rode the carousel and played in the balls. You didn't like the pipe maze too much. You followed your friend Logan into it when you first arrived at the play area. You soon came back out the way you went in without following him down the slide to exit. I think you get scared in those things sometimes. Later, the other kids at the party started a game of Duck, Duck, Goose. You joined in and did pretty well for being the youngest there.

We've been at Sunriver for a couple of days but you haven't got to do much except go swimming once. You have been coughing a lot and have a low grade fever. So, we haven't tried ice skating or skiing yet. You did go out with your cousin Rachel and uncle Ben to build a snowman and do a little sledding.

Well, it's now a few days later and we did go ice skating. You did very well for your first time on skates. You were very comfortable with 'the glide,' the notion that you can move pretty fast without moving your feet. You were able to pick up one foot and glide on the other while I was holding you. Near the end of the session I convinced you to do the last 5 or 6 feet by yourself. Uncle Ben has videos we can post here later.

Next up is your birthday party. You will be four years old in three days. You have 8 friends joining you at your party.

Love, aba.

This was originally written on December 26 but I was waiting to get home to find some photos to go with the post.

Suessical

Hi Sidra,

Last night you and I had a date. We went to a musical called "Suessical" that is based on a few Dr. Suess stories. We had a great time. It was staged by a local high school and they did a pretty good job with it. The costumes were very colorful and well done. The acting, singing and dancing was all quite good. Our seats were terrific. You clapped after every number and would have joined in the standing ovation at the final curtain if you knew what that meant. I had to pick you up so you could see past the forest of adults who were standing and applauding.

I have to give credit to your mom for suggesting this date. She noticed a review of the show in the local paper and we planned it right away. I bought the tickets online and we picked them up at the Will Call table. When we got there I assumed that it was festival seating. Who would have thought that a high school theater would have reserved seating? So I had chosen what I thought was a pretty good spot on the aisle because I thought it would be easier for you to see past the adults that way. I was bummed when someone came and told us we were in there seats. But it was good news! Our seats were in the sixth row, dead center. You sat on my lap for most of the show so you could be a little higher.

Afterward we stopped at Cold Stone for ice cream. There we found the evenings only flaw: they were out of chocolate! You settled for peppermint chocolate and I had cheesecake.

We had a little conflict while we were getting dressed and it resolved in a way that pleased and surprised me. You and your mom had already picked out the dress you were going to wear. When we went upstairs I my task was only to help you pick some tights to go with it. Now everyone knows I'm no fashionista but I was pretty sure I was right on this choice. You wanted to wear pink tights. You had two pairs of pink ones in the drawer but they didn't look right. I wanted you to wear the black ones. You really wanted pink. I said look, neither of these is the same pink as the pink in the dress but the black does match the dress. I went into my room to change my clothes and you came in a moment later and asked me to help you put on the black tights.

I did not expect that at all. You are strong willed like your mother and I and I thought we would really butt heads over that. Apparently you saw the logic in my argument and were willing to act on it over the emotional attachment you had to the pink. I'm hoping that this portends some other future grounded decisions in your future. But I'm not holding my breath!

Love, Aba

Happy Halloween!

Hi Sidra,

It is actually a few weeks since Halloween. I've been pretty busy with our Homecoming/Spirit week at school and volunteering for a couple of local candidates in the recent election. We did have fun on Halloween, though.
You were dressed as Dorothy of Kansas (Wizard of Oz character) and I dressed as the Tin Man. Your mom dressed as Glenda the good witch for a costume party the week before Halloween. We got your costume several weeks before Halloween but had to hide it from you after a couple of days because you kept putting it on and taking it off. The sequins were all falling off, too. You chose the costume after seeing it in a Target catalog that came in the Sunday paper. We even had ruby slippers for you. You and I went Trick or Treating around the neighborhood for and hour or so. You started like you'd just been given a shot of adrenaline and then eventually slowed down and even said you were ready to go home.
I was a little disappointed with your etiquette. You weren't that good about saying thank you and weren't that patient in letting your companion from next door, Jo-Jo, ring the doorbell or knock his share of the time. I will have to remember to have a little training session with you about what I expect from you in that regard.
In the video you and I sing a line from "Over the Rainbow" and I do little bit of the Tin Man's song. The camera person can be heard laughing over my song. I know I'm not a good singer but I did it for you, not for my own ego.
There's also a picture of you here with your friend Logan at the pumpkin patch. We had a good time there, too. The two of you went with me through the hay bale maze (basically a twisty dark tunnel with a low ceiling). Both of you were ready to turn back as soon as we got in far enough that no light from the entrance could be seen. I said we were in too deep and had to keep going and you guys held hands and boosted each others courage until we got out. It was a little more challenging than last year because I forgot to bring a headlamp and we only had the light of a cell phone to go on.
There's also a picture of you picking apples with Grandpa. You know, he is always willing to play with you and even gets down on his knees to get in the game. On this trip he even let you ride him like a horse!
The last picture is from our last family bike ride. We went this way: I pulled Shira in the trailer, mom rode her bike and you rode behind her on the trail a bike. Anyway, I thought it was cool how your hair is standing up as you go down the slide.

Channuka is coming.........

Love, aba

Speechless

Hi Sidra,

This is indescribable joy.


Love, aba

State Fair

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Hi Sidra

We went to the state fair two nights ago and had an interesting time. There were some animals and some carnival rides involved. But perhaps the most entertaining to we parents was the visit to the Lunchables booth. You had the chance to try a few activities there and you declined to wait in line to visit the school cool bus or climb the pyramid. However, you decided to step on the stage and put on this show for us.



Afterward, you said "I'm glad you got video of that. I bet Mike can't match those moves. That day at the lake house I was taking it easy on him. Anyone can roll on a couch but let's see him get in front of a lunchables bus with tights on and pick up a hula hoop." I don't know, but it sounds like you threw down a gauntlet there. If there is a duel, I'll root for you.

Love, Aba

Vacation 4

hi sidra,

after returning from maine there was a beach day and and a couple of fountain days in Boston. Your sister and I stayed home from the beach deciding that there wasn't much for a crawler to get out of the beach. By all accounts you used your beach time to the fullest extent. You played in the sand, played in the water, even tried a boogie board and didn't stop until you got in the car to come home where you conked out in another nap.

At the frog pond, you had two sessions in the water and one each in the playground and the carousel. You did a ride on the swan boats to rest, then posed for pictures with the make way for ducklings statues.

On another day we went to the Greenway to see the big hammock. Along the way we shopped at the Croc store, had lunch at Quincy Market and played in yet another fountain. You ended up getting sprayed in the face at pretty close range and didn't like it too much. We forgot about it by having a cart wheel somersault session on the grass.

So I think we've detailed most of the vacation activities. We all agreed that it was a really great vacation and we're excited to go back again another summer.

Love, Aba

Vacation 3

Hi Sidra,

After a couple of days in Brookline we headed to Long Lake in Maine as guests of your uncle David's family. We stayed right on the lake with the Thompsens, Tante Debbie and later uncle Ben. As it turns out you said that this was your favorite part of the vacation. In our conversation it was a little tough to suss out what exactly was your favorite thing. You seemed settled on the general term, 'the lake.' We tried to ask you if it was the swimming, the tubing, the kayaking, the jumping off the dock or the trampoline. You liked all those things (although you were sure that the kayaking wasn't at the top of the list) but curiously left Dance Party off the list-sorry Mike and Sara!
You were a great lake guest, pouring all your energy into each activity. We stayed for about 5 days and at least twice you were collapsed into a nap by mid afternoon. Once you slept about 2 hours on a bony deck chair.
You also got along quite well with your cousin Grace and your new friend Mike who agreed to play dolls with you. He did also engage you in a dance party. You worked him pretty hard and he had to draw Sara into the contest so he could rest a little.
Your mom got a chance to show off for you on our last day at the lake. Uncle David showed up pretty early because of the calm water to offer her a chance at water skiing. She took the chance to show you she could get up on one ski and made it look pretty easy.


The hard part was getting the video while holding Shira.

Love, Aba

Vacation 2

Hi Sidra,

Our first day in Boston was sort of a recovery day. We just hung out in Brookline and visited with our hosts. It was a long trip and there just wasn't any energy for getting out to do something that day.

On our second day we went into Boston and visited the Children's Museum. It is about 10 times better than the one in Portland. There is a lot more things to do and they are better quality activities, too. You got to do a climbing wall, the bubble room, some gravity games and the video shows you doing something in the Kid Power area. You are cranking the cycle to make the sign move up above you. You did a lot of other stuff but I missed a lot of it because I was hanging out with Shira in the infant area.




We were still just getting warmed up in the fun department. Next, what you said was your favorite part of the vacation.

Love, Aba

Vacation 1

Hi Sidra,
we just got back from a great vacation in the Northeast. There are lot's of things to tell about so I will do a few posts to recount the fun we had. First, I am just reporting that you were excited to wear your new Red Sox dress today. You actually would have worn it yesterday but we talked you out of wearing it for our long trip home. When your uncle Ben and I picked it out we thought it might fit you better next summer but it looks like you'll be wearing it well during the final months of the 2010 season. By the way, it nearly took force to get you to wear the cap with it for the picture. While it isn't an actual Red Sox hat it does match the outfit and you look very cute with it.

This morning I questioned you about your favorite part of the vacation. In the next post I'll write about what you said.

Love, Aba

More Summer Stuff

Hi Sidra,

Here I thought that during the summer I would be able to write a new blog post every week. Well, with both of you wanting attention it's hard to sit down to any quiet task for more than a minute or two. Many's the email that took 5 attempts to complete.

Here's some photos of your work on your dry erase easel. These are actually about a month and a half old. The way you draw yourself is a little different now. I took these pictures because it was the first time I'd seen you draw yourself. I thought it would be fun to compare them to later drawings. In the one that shows the whole family I drew the other people and you drew yourself. The one which has only you in the picture you did without any advice from me. In the one with the family you asked me about or I suggested some embellishments.

In the fourth photo I am hoping that our adult readers can suggest a caption without any background. I find the picture quite amusing and I think it would be interesting to see what others can say about what is happening there.

In the video, you and I are on the tilt a whirl ride at Oaks Park. I held the camera facing you while we rode. I have to explain that while it seems like you were pretty edgy about being on the ride that footage is only of the first 20 seconds or so when the operator was just warming us up. It was lucky that I chose to shut off and stow the camera right when I did because the operator tripled the speed just then. We both got off the ride wobbly from all the spinning. That was the most intense ride we went on. One other one that got you a little worked up was the balloon ride which took us up pretty high and spun, but not like the tilt a whirl.

We're getting ready to visit our Massachusetts family. You are pretty fired up about the trip. We are a little worried about how two little girls will handle a cross country plane ride. I'm sure there will be a lot to tell about the trip.










Love, Aba

Bike Derby 2010

Hi Sidra,

What a great summer day!
You did the bike derby and were in the pool for most of the afternoon. It was nearly record heat here today, so we the pool was at a good temperature and we got maximum enjoyment out of it. What made it a great day was how you played so hard the whole day and went to bed really tired. I like that. It means you got everything you could out of the day.

I don't know what to say about the bike derby. You won all three of your heats. As I said, it was really hot and your poses in the video and the pictures kind of show that. I guess someone might argue that your bike gave you an advantage, but I don't think so. I'm just thinking that if I were racing someone I would be happy to have pedals against someone on a 'runner.'

Anyway you did a great job and are really proud of your accomplishment. It doesn't really come across in the video or the pictures but you were really psyched that you won.



Love, Aba

Summer is Here!

Hi Sidra,

First let me tell you about our Father's Day. You and mom had gone shopping to get me something for Father's Day and after you were asking me some questions and telling me some things. You asked me if I liked beer. I wasn't sure how to answer that because at the moment I wasn't sure what motivated you to ask me that. So I gave an answer that I thought it was ok. I didn't want to say I LOVED beer and that it was a big part of my life. Then you went on to ask me about chocolate and I said I did love chocolate. As the conversation went on I realized what was going on and that my answers were probably good for you since you and mom had got me something chocolate. You may have considered beer but rejected that and settled on the chocolate. The chocolate was cute. It was a chocolate robot with a few 'lego' pieces that were candy also. They were actually colored chocolate. At least, they were sweet and the texture of chocolate but they didn't really taste much like chocolate.
The other part was about the card you got me. It was one of those cards that plays audio when you open it. You aren't very good at keeping a secret. But this time you didn't actually tell me everything ahead of time. I was able to surmise that you had got me a card that played music and that the song was 'Born to be Wild.' We actually sang it together several times before father's day arrived. I think I even googled it to make sure I was getting the lyrics right. On the morning of father's day I went out for a good long bike ride and planned to come in and sing my best version right away before you could hand me the card. That's more or less what happened. It turns out the card plays only the title phrase of the lyric so our version was much better by then anyway.
You've had some dance classes this month. The video shows a lot of the things that you did in the class. You are pretty good when you're paying attention. You were very excited each time about wearing your tutu and your dance shoes to class.
You also had swimming lessons the last two weeks. On your first day you were the only one in your class and it was in the shallow pool. You did everything the instructor asked you to. Afterwards, I asked her if you'd be better off in the big pool and she said yes. Well, the skills they are teaching in the big pool are right for you but you had a mental block about the deeper pool. There isn't anywhere in that pool that you can stand up and you had to hang on the side the whole time. The depth broke your confidence in your swimming ability. So you ended up freezing and asking to get out before class ended and asking earlier and earlier each day. So we wound up having you go back to the shallow pool for the last day. It was much better but you still got cold.
In the meantime you were swimming like a fish in the hot pool at Kahneetah and in our backyard pool which is ice cold. You can see that in the videos. Yes, you swam UNDER your mom and your sister in the Kahneetah pool.
You just had a visit from your east coast uncles last week. They were here for Noah's Quest. Ben is in one of the pictures, and David took two of the pictures.
You have been much more interested in and assertive about what you wear these days. You really like to wear dresses. You've been saying that you are pretty when you wear a dress. We tell you that it's not what you wear but what's inside you that makes you pretty or not. You've repeated that a few times but it will take a while to sink in. You got a new dress recently that is red, white and blue. You are going to wear it tomorrow(but not for the first time) for the 4th of July. Your sister got one, too.
Since I've been home more recently this next trait has faded slightly but you still do it. You will give a pretty good report about what's been going on while I've been gone as soon as I come in.
Even if it is not in your favor. Of course it takes some decoding because you speak it in the vernacular of a three and a half year old but most of the important points are there. For instance, you might say that you are not wearing a dress tomorrow because of some transgression or report on some other news. One morning I came in from my bike ride and you announced that you were ready for me to make the waffles I'd promised.
That's all for now. I'm sure there will be some more news soon. The Bike Derby is next week....

Love,
Aba

Role Models

Hi Sidra, I think this might be one of the most important postings I'll ever write. It will be some time before you're able to read it but I'll remember to make sure you do when you're old enough. This is about role models and who you should choose as your role models.
You're already making this choice unconsciously. At the moment your most important role models are your mom and I. You see, a role model is who you look to for ideas about how to behave. I know that one of your important role models is your mother because I hear you repeating things that she says to me. The other day it was about the grass clippings that end up on the sidewalk.
Some of your role models aren't the best choices. I've written here before about your recent obsessions with the Disney princesses. At the suggestion of one of the blog readers I bought you a copy of 'The Paper Bag Princess' as an opposing perspective. But as progressive political voices are overwhelmed by right wing talk on radio, the paper bag princess is far out numbered (9 to 1) by the Disney princesses. I know that you are guided by your exposure to them because you try to dress like them and tell me that you need to find a boy who can marry you. I know that in time your interest in the Disney girls will fade. You will simply grow out of this phase. Which movie character or celebrity will replace them? Later in life you may take interest in someone famous and let them influence your behavior and goals. It could be an actress, model, athlete or perhaps even a doctor or writer. People young and old often find inspiration in the activities of those who get attention from the entertainment media. I want you to know that you don't have to look that far for role models. You have many aunts, uncles, cousins, and close acquaintances whom you can look to for guidance. Whether you need inspiration in academics, athletics, spirituality, kindness, perseverance, work ethic, altruism, parenting (eventually) or career choices you will find someone in your extended family circle who exemplifies it.

In fact, I can direct your attention at two of your cousins. Two years ago your cousin Rachael was named the outstanding girl citizen out of a class of about 150 other girls. Just last month her sister Audrey was given the same honor. In my role as a senior class adviser at their school I had the honor of giving both girls their awards. What follows is what I said the night that I presented Audrey’s award.

It is always an honor to present the citizenship awards. Students who have earned these awards have done something in their school career to impress school staff. They might have impressed someone due to their service to others or by being just the most pleasant students to work with. Either way these students are likely to be confident but aren’t likely to have an inflated ego. I like to say this award is earned not because of what students see in them selves but because of what others see in them.

When she was a baby I used to call the girls citizenship winner the happy child. Either I always caught her on a good day or she has a sunny disposition. Earlier I said that students who win this award might have done so because of service to others or because of being very pleasant to work with. I think this girl has met both metrics. Classmates have elected her to student government and homecoming queen. She’s earned the approval of the staff on this vote. I’d just like to say that I hope my daughters grow into the kind of person their cousin is. By now her identity is no longer a secret. The 2010 outstanding female citizen is Audrey Mallon.

If you’ll allow me one more minute of family pride, I’d like Audrey’s parents, Terry and Ellen to stand. I just want to point out that they have raised two daughters, both have won the citizenship award in their senior year. They must be doing something right.

Since then, your uncle Terry and aunt Ellen, naturally, have expressed their modesty over my praise. But when I look ahead and think about what I would like you two sisters to be like when you are seniors in high school, I think that I would be intensely proud if you were even nominated for this kind of recognition, not to mention being chosen over 150 peers. As would any parent with kids the age you are now. In my mind the fact that both Rachael and Audrey both beat those long odds is proof that it was no accident.

Further, when I think about what kind of person you will be when you are graduating from high school, I would choose this way. Today, given the choice that you would be a valedictorian (in our school, hold a 4.0 gpa over four years) or be recognized for citizenship, I would choose citizenship hands down. It’s like this. The 4.0 student might be a driven, self absorbed system gamer, while the citizen is likely to be gracious, socially adept, and a fair player. The choice is easy.

I guess I should tell you that I reacted pretty emotionally these recent events. I was at a meeting with another senior adviser and other school officials when I learned that Audrey would be given the award. The others at the meeting would report that I received the news stoically and I suppose I did. I guess I wasn't surprised. I didn't vote because I knew she would be a contender and wanted to avoid any notion of favoritism. But that afternoon I spent most of my two hour bike ride thinking about what I would say when I presented the award. I later told your mom that I hadn't cried that much on a bike ride since your brother Noah died.

So, when you get older I'm hoping you'll recognize the real princesses and emulate them.

Love, Aba

Hi Sidra,

Well the school year is winding down for both of us. You will be done this week and I have about 3 more weeks. You will actually be going to a 'camp' at your school before my last day at school.

One thing you've been doing at school is learning some tumbling/gymnastics from your mom. She's been teaching all the kids at your school on Tuesdays. So last weekend was the school's open house. Your mom volunteered to have all the kids do a performance of the skills they have learned. You both did a great job. I was impressed by how well you stayed in line since your mom had reported that it was a problem for you when she was teaching. This didn't surprise me because I had been to a couple of her peewee sports classed that you were in. A couple times I had to take you home because you weren't listening to her. Anyway, you did well and I think your mom did well with the big classes of little kids. They were pretty well trained. For the performance, your mom also recruited your cousin Rachel to help keep kids in line. So the video shows you in your best moments. Your best move was the 'scissors' on the trampoline.

You've also developed a habit of giving me a report of the news of the day when I get home. It's interesting and would probably be difficult to follow for a stranger. Sometimes I have to depend on what I've heard from your mom on the phone to really decipher the story. It's kind of funny too that you will report on things you got in trouble for while I was gone. That might be something that fades from the report when you get older. Anyway, it's fun to listen to.

I've posted some of the pictures here from our sitting in the photographer's studio. You were a really good helper and the one that was able to get your sister to smile most of the time.
We get to go to Kahneetah next weekend and enjoy warm water even if the weather is cold.

Love, Aba

Getting to Know the Princesses

Hi Sidra,

You've been spending a lot of time listening to stories, watching movies, and playing with some of the Disney princesses. You've become quite enamored of them and a bit of an expert on their various stories. At least, I think you know more than I do about them. I learned that there are 9
Disney princesses and I can't name but a few although I do know that your favorite is Ariel the little Mermaid. I can't really say why you like her better than the others but I felt mildly positive about her today at the pool when you said you were going to swim and dive "like Ariel."

Your most prevalent use of "princess culture" is in your desire to get married or have certain dolls get married. You asked me to marry you, asked me to marry a new Barbie doll you're calling 'Belle,' and are generally talking about marriage quite a bit. It should be noted that you clearly haven't the slightest clue about what getting married means.

The way I counter this is to tell you bedtime stories with a theme that competes with the princess stories. I'll tell you a story in which you actually meet one of the princesses and they tell you that they are tired of waiting around the palace for a prince to show up. So they tell you that they've decided to quit waiting and go out to have adventures and then write books about them. Or that they have found a fulfilling life as a teacher, or a nurse, or a doctor, or an artist, or anything but a princess. I don't think it will surprise anyone when I say that you don't particularly like my versions of the stories. When I finish you will say 'but I want to be a princess.' I'll sigh and reply 'I know.'

You had a great time when we went to the Wooden Shoe Tulip farm a couple of weeks ago. You wore your tutu and climbed all over the haystack, rode the 'cow train,' pumped water for the ducky races and slid down the bouncy slide.

You've learned on your own to do a seat drop and make it back to your feet on your trampoline. In the video you are in your newest tutu, an orange one. You are a pretty good sport about entertaining your little sister, which for you is pretty easy. She doesn't miss much when you're in the vicinity.

Love Aba.

Leaving Your Mark

Hi Sidra,

You got some new clothes the other day and wanted to show them off. So we had a little photo shoot/dance session. A few posts ago I wrote about a move that you do that shows your exuberance and your age. I said I knew it was something you would grow out of and that I enjoyed seeing you do it because it meant you're still a little kid. Well, in our dance session I got you to pose it for me and here it is. I won't bother with a description of your outfit, my fashion acumen isn't up to it. I included a photo of you playing with your sister in her first ride in the bouncer swing.

You wore the same outfit today to a family event so the west coaster family got to see you in it and see some of your moves. They also got to hear you say you were wearing a 'tutu.'

Sometime ago you and your mom made a plaster handprint and footprint with your name on it. Recently someone brought your mom an advertising flyer with a picture of your prints on it. So lots of people are seeing your prints as an example of how nice theirs could look.

You did a cute thing this morning. You came in my office after you got up carrying a doll that has a little bottle for 'feeding' it and also a pacifier. You were talking about feeding it and giving it it's binky. Then you said that 'my mom pumped some milk for her.' I got a kick out of that.

Love,
Aba

Spring Break??

Hi Sidra,

I'm on vacation this week and we're trying to enjoy 'spring break' as much as we can. We are slowed a little by having two of you now and mom only has a couple of days that she's not working. In Oregon spring break isn't always (or often!) fun in the warm sun. We did have a really nice day today and yesterday was pretty good, too. Since it was nice today we decided to take advantage of our Zoo membership. The only problem with that was that everyone else had the same idea and they had more urgency about it so by the time we got to the Zoo there was no parking anywhere and at least 150 other families hoping there would be a vacancy soon. We ended up going to a park we hadn't been to near troutdale.

It was an interesting time at the playground. Shortly after we arrived you ran into some school chums. Nate and Noah, twins who go to your school. It seemed like they recognized you right off but you weren't too sure about them at first. Then they nearly demanded that you tag along with them. They were competing for your attention but not in a divisive way. It was probably good that they were twins because as a 'not the oldest' sibling I know how the older kid can dominate the play. It happened to me and I'm sure you will do it to your little sister. It's just the way pecking orders work. But these two boys were really good at sharing the lead. Both were able to give in to the wishes of the other in almost equal measure. They were older and quicker than you and I think that's the reason you mostly allowed them to dictate the play. You chose your own distractions a few times and more so as time passed. I was able to catch the three of you in the picture frame just once with any quality and it's interesting that you are between them. I only could tell them apart by their different colored shirts as they even chose to wear their caps the same way, pulled down over the eyes.

We had some tough times the last couple of nights at bedtime. You are pretty adamant about not liking being alone at bedtime. This has become a more acute problem since your sister arrived but I think I have finally figured out how to deal with it. After I read you a few books I turn out the light and turn on your bedtime music. Then I read my book and wait for you to fall asleep. You'd gotten in the habit of crawling all over me and flipping and flopping and stalling and not lying still to go to sleep. Well, I made good on my promise of leaving if you didn't comply a couple of times. You didn't like it but I think we're making progress. I can just see how good of a negotiator and arguer you're going to be in about 10 years. I'm going to need to up my game.

We were lucky to catch you and Shira in almost the same pose being enchanted by the Pooh chair at different times.

We were at Kahneetah the last couple of days. Your swimming bravery and skill had been regressing. So we were worried that we would get all the way over there and you would not really enjoy it. The weather wasn't very good so that looked like it might put a damper on things. We were worried that you wouldn't want to go down the slide. Well the warm water pool apparently worked it's magic on you. On a cloudy 50 degree afternoon in a stiff breeze you walked right over to the slide and went in without even testing the water. So our fears were completely unfounded. You had your head under water as much as it was out and you began to understand how arm strokes and kicks can help propel you through the water.

The video is of our trip to a play place called Kids Club a few days ago. Your favorite thing was the small slide which I rode with you several times. But you only went down the yellow slide. OK, you went down the red once and the green once but the other 40 times you chose yellow even if you had to wait a significant time to get on it. I guess that's what I might have done when I was a kid. I would keep at something I knew and was comfortable with before branching out to something else, even if it were just a different color. A few times you hesitated at the top of the slide before going down. I worried at first that it might be because of who was there. There were some kids of color there and you're not used to seeing them. I wondered if that was it but realized it was something else when you would stall when there was no one there with you. It turns out that there was a ball transport system that was making noise right above the slide launch pad and you didn't like the noise. In any case you can tell from the video that you liked the slide.



love, aba

Catching Up

Hi Sidra,

I haven't written here for a while. You've been struggling to adjust to having a little sister around the house. It isn't anything obvious but more subtle differences in your behavior. It seems clear that you are seeking attention in different ways than before. You seem to be operating on the notion that negative attention is as satisfying as positive attention. I don't think you are trying to be devious in any way but you are trying some different things that try our patience.

I have to report one cute thing you did at the swimming pool a few weeks ago. There was a little boy about your age, maybe a little younger there. You were both staying pretty close to the stairs where you are tall enough to stand on your own. Actually, the other boy never went past the second step to the frustration of his grandmother. You asked him what his name was and he replied. I wasn't close enough to hear what he said. I asked you later if you knew what he said and you didn't, either. But you said, "I'm Sidra. S-I-D-R-A" I don't know what caused you to spell it out but it was really cute to hear you do that.

You've been having play dates with your friend Logan. You seem to get along really well with him. I haven't been present for one yet but both parents report that you play hard for 2 solid hours when your together and usually stay out of trouble. I guess it's good for you that he likes 'dress up.'

More later.......

love, aba.

The Spelling trick

Hi Sidra,

In the last post there was a video showing you apparently spelling some words like owl, van, and toast. You were definitely pushing the right buttons on your toy. I'm not sure you were really spelling. I showed you how you could push the right buttons. The toy you were using only asks you to spell words that are on the toy. Near each of the buttons on the toy is a word beginning with that letter. So, next to E is ear. The only words that you are asked to spell are the ones that are on the toy. I showed you that if you knew the letter the word starts with then all you needed to do was look at the word on the toy to find the other letters.
You can see in the video how you are looking near the T button to complete the spelling of toast. Even though you have that hint going for you I am still impressed that you can use that strategy.

Love, aba

Are you Spelling?

Hi Sidra,

well you can look at this video and wonder if you are really spelling just a week after your third birthday. In the next post I will tell the rest of the story. You are playing with a cool toy you got from your Uncle Ben.


We went swimming today and you did some new things. You were not as prolific with your attempts at real swimming but you did climb out of the pool on your own. Not just walking up the stairs or the ladder but going to the side of the pool and lifting yourself out. You didn't even need to be on the stairs. You were in water that was way to deep for you to touch bottom. Your natural instincts about things like that amaze me. I didn't show you anything about how to do it, you simply did it pretty much the way I would have taught you.
The other thing you did was ride your 'noodle' (it's a foam floaty thing) like a horse. I don't see how you can balance on it but you do it beautifully. I try it and it seems really hard to stay upright. You make it look easy. The fact that I weight about 6 times as much as you may have something to do with it.
At school this week the 'sharing' sound was S and you took a thing from one of your puzzles. It was a sun, and you did know how to spell it. We dropped off an orange and a shoe box at school. You will be using the orange to squeeze orange juice and the shoebox is for a mailbox for valentines day.
Ok, in the next post I will share the spelling secrets.

Love, aba

Back to Reality

Hi Sidra,
you've been recovering from about a month of hedonist living that you may not ever be able to match. You were smothered with gifts and attention day after day.

First there was 8 days of Channuka with gifts each day. Then family arrived and you suddenly had the attention of five more adult visitors. You earned your share of the limelight in spite of the presence of your new baby sister. Then there was your third birthday party. It was a 'Curious George' party. That's a copy of of the invitations in one of the pictures. There's also a picture of you giving one of your party guests a 'goody bag' to thank them for coming. It's one of your classmates Esa, which is short for Isabella. And we can't forget your trip to the mall. You returned from that with some booty as well.

Without a doubt your favorite visitor and playmate was uncle Ben. Countless times you called for him "uncle Ben, can you come upstairs?" Countless times he answered the call and countless times you two 'washed the puppies' in your room. We tried to suggest to him ways of diverting you to other activities but he remained unselfish with his time. You'll have to thank him for his patience when you're old enough to understand what that means.

It's all over now. You're back to a more regular routine with school tomorrow.

I was just thinking last night that I will be sad when you are grown up enough to give up one of your cute habits. You always show excitement by bouncing around the room while bubbling about what is exciting you. And you always do this thing where you lean against some piece of furniture and stick your foot up in the air behind you. It's one of those things that is really hard to catch in a photo or a video in it's true unrehearsed form. It's one of those things that has to be witnessed first hand, like a really good sunset or a moonshadow. When you stop doing it it will mean you've lost some of your 'little girl' and I will feel some sadness over that.

And finally, your stats at your 3rd birthday: 37½ inches tall, 31 pounds, head circumference 51 cm.

Love, aba